Feeling Lost in Your 20s? Here’s Why That’s Normal (And How Therapy Can Help)

If you’re in your 20s and constantly feel like you’re falling behind while everyone else seems to have their life perfectly mapped out, you’re far from alone. Social media can make it look like your peers are landing dream jobs, settling into ideal relationships, and checking off milestone after milestone. Meanwhile, you might feel stuck in a cycle of anxiety, confusion, self-doubt, or burnout.

The truth is, your 20s are one of the most uncertain, transitional decades of life. It's a period filled with pressure to “figure it all out” while you’re still learning who you are. The feeling of being lost isn’t a sign you’re doing life wrong, it’s actually a normal, expected part of growth. And therapy can help you navigate this stage with more clarity, confidence, and self-understanding.

What the “Quarter-Life Crisis” Really Means

We often hear about midlife crises, but what’s becoming increasingly common is the quarter-life crisis, a time in your early adult years when you feel directionless, overwhelmed, or like you’re not living up to your own or others’ expectations.

Research has shown that young adults often report higher rates of anxiety and depression than any other age group, largely due to the unique pressure points of this life stage:

• Making major career decisions with limited experience or clarity

• Navigating financial stress while trying to establish independence

• Figuring out what you want from relationships, love, and friendships

• Managing parental expectations or cultural pressures

• Trying to define your identity in a world that offers endless choices

It’s a decade full of firsts your first job, your first major breakup, your first apartment, and your first experience of real-life stressors without the safety net of school or home. Feeling lost in the face of all this is not only common, it’s expected.

Why This Season Feels So Overwhelming

Many young adults tell us in therapy that they feel like they’re “supposed to have it all figured out.” There’s a sense of urgency to make the right decisions about careers, relationships, and life goals, even though you may still be figuring out what you value or want.

At the same time, many are managing emotional struggles that haven’t been fully processed like childhood dynamics, identity questions, or patterns of people-pleasing. Without time to reflect or support systems to talk through these issues, it can all feel like too much.

There’s also the reality that post-pandemic adulthood looks different than what many people expected. Economic instability, remote work, and shifting social dynamics have created even more uncertainty and isolation.

What Therapy Can Do For You in Your 20s

Therapy offers a unique space where you don’t have to have all the answers. Instead, it becomes a place to ask the right questions about who you are, what you value, and what’s getting in the way of the life you want.

With the support of a therapist, you can:

1. Clarify What You Actually Want

So many people in their 20s follow paths that were chosen for them by parents, schools, or societal expectations. Therapy helps you sort through that noise and get clear about what you want, what aligns with your values, and what kind of life feels fulfilling to you.

2. Understand and Cope with Anxiety

Anxiety is one of the most common issues for young adults, especially those who feel pressure to succeed. In therapy, you’ll learn how to recognize anxious thought patterns, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and create more grounded ways of approaching uncertainty.

3. Build Healthier Relationships and Boundaries Whether you're struggling in a romantic relationship, dealing with friendship fallouts, or figuring out how to set boundaries with your family, therapy can help. You’ll learn how to express your needs, protect your energy, and stop people-pleasing out of fear.

4. Develop Self-Compassion

Many people in their 20s are incredibly hard on themselves, comparing their progress to others or feeling behind. Therapy helps you rewrite those inner narratives and treat yourself with more understanding, patience, and grace as you grow.

5. Take Action, Even If You Don’t Have the Whole Picture

You don’t need a 10-year plan to move forward. Therapy gives you tools to take small, meaningful steps—even in the face of uncertainty so you can begin building a life that actually feels like yours.

Therapy That Meets You Where You Are

At Cardinal Hope, we specialize in supporting young adults who are feeling overwhelmed by the weight of expectations, transitions, and identity questions. If this sounds like you, our graduate intern Robyn Miller is currently accepting new clients at a reduced rate.

Robyn creates a warm, nonjudgmental space for young adults to explore their experiences, build coping tools, and feel more grounded in who they are. Whether you're facing a big decision, healing from a tough season, or simply trying to make sense of your next steps, you're not alone.

Virtual sessions are available to fit your schedule and your life.

Ready to Feel Less Stuck?

If you’re ready to stop spinning your wheels and start building the life you actually want, we’re here to help. Schedule a free consultation with Robyn today: 

Book Today

Resources:

• Psychology Today (2024). “Quarter-Life Crisis: What It Is and How to Cope.” https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-clarity/202401/quarter-life-crisis-what-it-is-and-how-to-cope

• American Psychological Association (2023). “Emerging Adulthood and Identity Formation.” https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2023/11/young-adults-mental-health

• NPR Life Kit Podcast (2024). “Figuring Out Your 20s Without Falling Apart.” https://www.npr.org/2024/02/03/life-kit-figuring-out-your-20s