Therapy for Relationship Trauma, Self-Esteem, and Identity
A relationship involving control, manipulation, or emotional abuse can leave a person questioning their own judgment. Conversations get replayed, blame gets turned inward, and it becomes hard to know whether a concern is reasonable or whether they're somehow at fault. Even in a new relationship, there can be worry about upsetting someone, being misunderstood, or ending up in the same situation again.
Marcella works with women and LGBTQIA+ clients whose past relationships have affected their self-esteem and trust, as well as people exploring their identity or dealing with loss. She offers virtual therapy to clients throughout New York.
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When a Past Relationship Leaves You Doubting Yourself
An argument ends with an apology, even though the hurt wasn't yours to cause. A concern gets dismissed, and somehow the conversation turns into what you did wrong. After enough of these experiences, it's easy to question your own memory, feelings, and judgment.
Those doubts can carry into other relationships. A delayed text brings on worry. A disagreement feels like a sign that something is wrong. Saying no brings guilt, even when the request is unreasonable. It can be difficult to recognize what feels healthy when a past relationship has changed what feels normal.
When You're Exploring Your Identity
Questions about gender or sexuality can bring up concerns about relationships, acceptance, and how much of yourself feels comfortable to share. There may be uncertainty about labels, coming out, or how a partner, friend, or family member might respond.
For some people, the questions are more personal: what feels right, what has been shaped by other people's expectations, and what life might look like with a better understanding of themselves. For others, the challenge is navigating relationships while figuring things out.
There may be relief in understanding yourself better, along with worry about how important relationships might change. Both can be part of the experience.
When You're Dealing With Loss
A breakup can hurt even when ending the relationship was the right decision. There may be missing someone who caused pain, feeling angry about how things ended, or struggling with the future the two of you had planned.
Grief after a death brings different changes. Holidays, family gatherings, and everyday routines can feel different without someone who used to be there. A break in family ties can bring relief from a painful relationship alongside sadness about losing that connection.
What Therapy With Marcella Can Actually Look Like
Sessions can start with something that happened during the week. An interaction that left you questioning yourself, a boundary that was hard to set, or a conversation about identity that brought up difficult feelings can all be places to begin.
Marcella takes a person-centered, trauma-informed approach and draws on narrative and somatic therapy. Narrative work can involve looking at beliefs that developed during a difficult relationship, such as feeling responsible for everyone else's reactions or believing that personal needs are a burden. Somatic work can involve noticing how your body responds when a conversation starts to feel tense or unsafe, including physical signs of stress such as muscle tension or a racing heart.
Marcella also considers how culture, family, and expectations around gender and relationships shape a person's experiences.
Why Work With Marcella?
Marcella is a New York State Limited Permit Mental Health Counselor. She earned her master's degree in Mental Health and Wellness from New York University and her bachelor's degree in Biology and Psychology from Siena College.
Her work experience includes supporting women with personal and relationship concerns at a women's center, as well as providing outreach and residential support to women and children at a domestic violence shelter.
These experiences inform her interest in how relationship abuse can affect self-esteem, trust, and future relationships. Marcella is also continuing to expand her training in grief work.
Marcella offers virtual therapy to clients located throughout New York.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can therapy help me recover from an emotionally abusive relationship?
Therapy can provide space to talk about what happened and how it has affected your self-esteem, trust, and boundaries. Sessions can focus on concerns that still come up in everyday life and relationships.
Can I talk about gender or sexuality while I'm exploring my identity?
Yes. Sessions can include questions about gender, sexuality, coming out, dating, and how others might respond. The focus can be on the questions and concerns that matter most to you.
Can therapy help with grief after a breakup or family estrangement?
Yes. The end of a relationship or a break in family ties can bring sadness, anger, relief, and uncertainty. These experiences can be discussed alongside other concerns in therapy.
What happens in the first therapy session?
The first session is an opportunity to talk about what's been going on and what led to seeking therapy. There's no requirement to share every detail of a past relationship or other difficult experience right away.
Does Marcella offer virtual therapy in New York?
Yes. Marcella offers virtual therapy to clients located throughout New York. Cardinal Hope also offers a free 15-minute consultation with Laura, the practice administrator, to answer questions about getting started.
Let's Talk About Getting Started
If past relationships, questions about identity, or a significant loss have been affecting daily life, a consultation is a chance to talk about what you're looking for and whether Marcella might be a good fit.
Cardinal Hope Mental Health Counseling Services offers a free 15-minute consultation with Laura, the practice administrator.