How to Tell If a Relationship Is Healthy or Unhealthy: 5 Signs to Look For in 2025

Posted: August 5, 2025

In a world of situationships, gaslighting TikToks, and conflicting dating advice, it’s never been harder to tell whether your relationship is healthy or just familiar.

For many people who’ve experienced inconsistent love, codependency, or people-pleasing in childhood, unhealthy patterns can feel almost normal.

But here’s the truth: healthy love feels safe, not confusing.

Whether you’re in a new relationship, considering couples therapy, or reflecting on past dynamics, here are five signs to help you spot the difference between a connection that helps you grow and one that keeps you stuck.

1. Communication Is Clear Not Confusing

In healthy relationships, you don’t have to guess what the other person is feeling or thinking. Conversations might still be hard (because conflict is normal!), but they lead to understanding not walking on eggshells.

Healthy example: “I feel hurt when we don’t talk about things. Can we try again?”

Unhealthy example: “Nothing’s wrong” followed by silence, coldness, or punishment

2. Boundaries Are Respected, Not Punished

If you say you need time, space, or rest and it’s met with guilt trips or anger that’s not respect. Healthy love honors limits and adapts.

Healthy: “Of course, take what you need.”

Unhealthy: “Wow, guess I’m not important to you anymore.”

3. You Can Be Fully Yourself

You don’t feel like you need to shrink, overperform, or pretend to be someone you’re not. In fact, a healthy partner wants you to be your full self even when you’re struggling.

4. Repair Happens After Conflict

Arguments are inevitable but in strong relationships, there’s a clear effort to repair not just avoid. In healthy relationships you talk, take accountability, and reconnect. It’s not about being perfect, it’s about being honest and safe.

5. You Feel Safe in Your Body

This one matters most! If your nervous system is constantly on edge around someone, pay attention. Safety isn’t just about avoiding physical harmit’s about emotional security too.

Why This Matters

At Cardinal Hope Mental Health Counseling, we work with adults who want more than survival in their relationships they want security, clarity, and peace. Katherine, one of our couples and individual therapists, helps clients explore relationship patterns, improve communication, and build self-trust in love.

You don’t need to settle for “just getting by.” You deserve a relationship that helps you feel safe, seen, and supported.

Katherine is currently accepting new clients at learn more about her here

Resources:

The Gottman Institute (2024). What Makes Love Last? Retrieved from: www.gottman.com
Therapist Aid (2025). Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationship Dynamics.
Psychology Today (2024). How to Spot a Secure Relationship.
American Psychological Association (2025). The Role of Emotional Safety in Romantic Partnerships.