Is It Me or the Relationship?
How to Spot Unhealthy Dynamics (and Start Finding Clarity)
You’ve been feeling off in your relationship for a while. Maybe you find yourself second-guessing everything you say, walking on eggshells to keep the peace, or constantly wondering, “Am I asking for too much?”
It’s not that things are always bad there are good moments, too. But something just doesn’t feel right. You might leave conversations feeling more confused than heard. Or maybe you try to set a boundary, only to feel guilty, shut down, or misunderstood.
If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Is this just me being sensitive, or is something deeper going on?” you’re not alone. These questions are incredibly common for people who’ve struggled with people-pleasing, anxious attachment, or difficult past relationships. And the answers aren’t always black and white but they are within reach.
What Unhealthy Relationship Dynamics Can Actually Look Like
When we hear the phrase “unhealthy relationship,” most people think of dramatic or extreme situations. But in reality, the signs are often subtle especially when you’ve grown used to putting others first or have never been shown what a truly healthy connection looks like.
Some patterns Katherine’s clients bring into therapy include:
Feeling like you have to earn love, approval, or affection
Saying yes when you really want to say no
Feeling emotionally drained after time with your partner or friends
Avoiding conflict at all costs even when something hurts
Silencing yourself out of fear of being “too much” or starting an argument
Struggling to name or hold onto your own needs and opinions
These experiences can lead to burnout, low self-esteem, and a deep sense of disconnection not just from others, but from yourself.
Therapy Can Help You Rebuild from the Inside Out
At Cardinal Hope Mental Health Counseling Services, Katherine works with individuals and couples across New York who want to better understand their relationship dynamics, strengthen their boundaries, and build confidence in who they are without guilt, fear, or confusion.
In virtual sessions, you’ll work together to:
Identify what’s yours and what’s been projected onto you
Learn to speak up without shame, shutdown, or spiraling
Navigate faith-based questions in a safe, compassionate space (if important to you)
Shift from people-pleasing to self-respect
Explore past experiences that shaped how you show up in love today
Whether you’re exploring a relationship that feels unclear, processing breakups or abandonment wounds, or learning how to express yourself without walking on eggshells, therapy can give you tools that last beyond the hour.
You Deserve Relationships Where You Feel Safe, Seen, and Secure
The truth is, we all carry stories about what love is supposed to look like. But sometimes, those stories come from pain, fear, or survival not truth. Therapy can help you sort through those narratives and begin writing a new one, rooted in honesty, clarity, and connection.
If you’ve been asking yourself, “Is it me or the relationship?” you don’t have to figure it out alone.
At Cardinal Hope Mental Health Counseling Services, Katherine offers virtual therapy in New York with a focus on helping clients build healthier relationships, improve communication, and reconnect with their authentic selves.
Katherine is currently accepting new clients. Ready for clarity and confidence in your relationships? 👉Book a free 15-minute consultation today.